I went to the midnight showing and before you ask me if I wore a robe or grabbed some potter glasses to wear, let me just express that I have never had the urge to wear the school-girl outfits and furthermore after last week's midnight showing experience I am fearful of what the cos-play would bring out in me.
Yes, if I still had my greasy shoulder-length hair and high school attitude of "everyone hates me and I hate them" I think I could pull off a short, plump Snape, standing in the corner, glaring up at everyone.
But, my Alan Rickman impression is terrible.
Actually, do you want to watch someone who can actually do a good Alan Rickman impression? Go here.
And in the meantime...
While waiting in line to collect my $12.58 bag of popcorn and "medium" sized soda my friend Jonathan and I were standing, a bit perplexed amongst the fully-uniformed Hogwarts students that had all decided to play hooky to a muggle movie theater on the same night.
There was a gal in front of us in a full Ravenclaw outfit--quite spot on, with the purple tie, robe, sweater and skirt to boot.
But, that wasn't the best part. The best part was the man who ACTUALLY embodied Snape.
He was wandering around, fully clothed in Snape-Gear, complete with greasy black wig and devilish sneer.
Now at the time we were one person closer to getting to our drinks and candy when all of a sudden the Ravenclaw girl in front of us broke out into what resulted in a quasi-dramatic-scene with Mr. Snape, who happened to take an interest in the Jujubees.
The two of them proceeded to have a real-time interaction, in character, one as a Ravenclaw Hogwarts student (who was FAR too happy to be talking to Snape if you asked me) and the other as the agonizingly disdainful Professor.
Meanwhile, we wanted our drinks and popcorn and the line behind us was still just as large as it was when we got in.
The guy manning the cash register was stuck, waiting for the interaction to end. Just as much as Jonathan and I were stuck, wondering exactly how not to laugh. Because it's not funny--they truly wanted to play and wanted to have an audience to play with and the moment you start laughing it's as if you're saying "You're stupid for believing in fantasy."
When it's like I'm here, too, I've read the books, too, I want to believe just as much as you do. I just... don't show it like that. I just own two copies of each book (UK and US versions) and then dress up as an awkward school boy the other 364 days of the year. True Story:
When Mr. Snape and Ravenclaw Girl had disbanded (I believe he threatened her convincingly with detention or something for blowing his cover) we were able to make our purchases and move on.
But, that moment stuck with me because I really wanted to laugh and then I felt like a total hypocrite. Whenever I feel like a hypocrite I know I've hit on something important to me.
The fact is I really like dressing up. I can't help that. And if I had had a proper Hogwarts costume I would have totally worn it, only I would have gone as a dykey Hogwarts student*. But, I don't have it in me to bleed my reality with my fantasy that closely and with strangers, in front of strangers. For some reason it really bothers me, possibly perhaps because when I was a kid that was the exact kind of thing *I would* get lost in. Also, for a while I was training as an actor. From that I learned how difficult it actually is to pull on another person's skin, let alone a costume. Also, I learned how easy it is to fall in love with fantasy and grow to dislike reality. That can be... a dangerous way to live.
So, conclusion: there is nothing wrong with fantasy. I'll say it again, there is nothing wrong with fantasy. I'm just wary of loosing myself to something in my mind...again.
*Is Dumbledore the only gay character in all of Hogwarts? I wonder if Hogwarts has a GSA? Would they call it the GSWA (Gay Straight Wizard Alliance)? Would it include the LGBT house elves? So many questions!